Help for domestic abuse

This advice applies to Scotland. See advice for See advice for England, See advice for Northern Ireland, See advice for Wales

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If you've been threatened or feel unsafe

Call the police on 999 if you need protection immediately. If it's too dangerous to speak, dial '55' on your mobile when you're prompted. You can also let the operator know you need help by tapping the phone or making a noise.

You can contact Scotland's Domestic Abuse and Forced Marriage Helpline by phone, email or webchat 24 hours a day. Call 0800 027 1234

Are you experiencing abuse

Domestic abuse is a crime in Scotland. If you're being harmed by your partner or ex-partner you may be experiencing domestic abuse. This isn't your fault and there are organisations that can help you. 

It can be hard to see the signs that domestic abuse is happening or come to terms with it. You might not feel like you're a 'typical' victim of abuse but there isn't one. It can affect people of any age, including teenagers and students. 80% of victims are female but men can also be victims. 

Your abuser doesn't have to be violent towards you for it to be abuse. They might be using tactics to undermine you, remove your freedom and trap you into living under their control - this is called coercive control. The abuse could be directed towards you, your children or even your pets as a way to intimidate and control you. 

You should seek specialist support if you or your children are experiencing any behaviour from a partner or ex-partner that is:

  • mentally and emotionally abusive - verbal abuse, undermining your confidence, gaslighting (making you question your version of what's happened)

  • violent, including sexual violence

  • isolating - from friends, relatives, health services and sources of support

  • monitoring or controlling - for example, tracking you, watching your social media accounts, making you stay in the house during the day or limiting time at the shops

  • degrading or punishing - for example, not allowing you to eat or rewarding you for only 'good' behaviour

  • financially controlling - for example, not allowing you to have your own bank account or having benefits paid only to the abuser

  • intimidating - for example, threats of violence

  • harmful towards pets or your belongings - this might be to manipulate, frighten or control you.

As well as domestic abuse you might be experiencing other types of gender-based violence, like stalking, rape or sharing intimate photos or videos without consent. There are other specialist organisations that can help you.

If you're not sure if it's abuse

Scotland's Domestic Abuse and Forced Marriage Helpline has trained workers who can talk to you about your situation and help you understand what's happening. 

Both men and women can phone or email 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. It's confidential and can be anonymous if you want. There's a translation service if English isn't your preferred language. 

If you think there's a chance your calls or emails are being monitored by your partner or ex-partner, it might be best to call from a public phone, the phone of a friend you trust or from your local Citizens Advice Bureau with the help of an adviser

Scotland's Domestic Abuse and Forced Marriage Helpline

Tel: 0800 027 1234

Email: helpline@sdafmh.org.uk

Website: sdafmh.org.uk

How to find out if your partner has an abusive past

You can find out if your partner or ex-partner has abused other people in the past by applying to Police Scotland’s Disclosure Scheme, also called Clare’s Law.

The police can tell you whether your partner has a history of being abusive and you’ll get help and support to decide whether to continue the relationship.

You can apply for yourself or someone you know.

To apply to the scheme, and find out more about it:

If you want to leave an abusive relationship

Before you leave it's important to make a safety plan with the help of advisers at Scotland's Domestic Abuse and Forced Marriage Helpline. They're trained to help people leave abusive relationships safely. 

Your safety plan should be tailored to you and might cover things like: 

Get help to make your safety plan from the Domestic Abuse and Forced Marriage Helpline

If you need money

If you urgently need money you could apply for:

  • a crisis grant or a community care grant from the Scottish Welfare Fund – these are grants from local councils that don’t have to be paid back. Find out more about the Scottish Welfare Fund

  • emergency help from your council's social work department – you might be able to get a cash payment called a section 12 payment. If you have children, you might be able to get a section 22 payment. Find contact details for your local council

  • a budgeting loan or a budgeting advance – these are loans from the DWP that have to be repaid from your benefits. For budgeting advances, you need to be getting Universal Credit. Read more about budgeting advances and how to get one. For budgeting loans, you need to be getting other benefits such as Income Support, Pension Credit, income-based Jobseeker’s Allowance or income-related Employment and Support Allowance. Check how to get a budgeting loan and how to apply.

You might also need to sort out non urgent money issues. You should check if you are entitled to any benefits and whether to apply for any maintenance for yourself or your children.

You could use a benefit calculator or contact your local Citizens Advice Bureau to ask for a benefit check and to find out about other financial help you could get.

Getting help from Scotland's Domestic Abuse and Forced Marriage Helpline

The helpline is for anyone affected by abuse, including friends or family members supporting someone affected by abuse. 

Both men and women can phone or email 24 hours a day. It's confidential and can be anonymous if you want. The helpline is run by Women's Aid in partnership with the Men’s Advice Line. If you're a man you'll be put through to the Men’s Advice Line.

There's a translation service if English isn't your preferred language. You can use this helpline whatever your immigration status is. 

If you think your calls or emails are being monitored by your partner or ex-partner, it might be best to call from a public phone, the phone of a friend you trust or from your local Citizens Advice Bureau with the help of an adviser.

Specially-trained staff will answer the phone. Find out more about what to expect when you call on the helpline's website

Scotland's Domestic Abuse and Forced Marriage Helpline

Tel: 0800 027 1234

Email: helpline@sdafmh.org.uk

Website: sdafmh.org.uk

If you don't feel able to contact the helpline you could also speak first to an adviser at your local Citizens Advice Bureau and they could phone on your behalf. This might be easier if you are already going there to speak about something else, like your benefits or housing. Read more about how an adviser can help

More support if you're a woman

The Scottish Women's Rights Centre can help you with free legal advice, for example about court orders to protect your from abuse and reporting the abuser to the police.

They have face-to-face legal clinics in local areas and a helpline which covers legal advice, sexual harassment and advocacy support.

Scottish Women's Aid run Scotland's Domestic Abuse and Forced Marriage Helpline. They also have local support groups around the country and operate refuges. 

Scottish Women's Aid

2nd Floor

132 Rose Street

Edinburgh

EH2 3JD

Tel: 0131 226 6606

Domestic Abuse and Forced Marriage Helpline: 0800 027 1234 (24 hours)

Email: info@womensaid.scot

Website: www.womansaid.scot

More support if you're a man

Scotland's Domestic Abuse and Forced Marriage Helpline is for men too. When you phone you'll be put through to the Men’s Advice Line. You could also phone them directly. 

Respect - previously Men's Advice Line (MALE)

Helpline: 0808 8010 327

Monday to Friday, 9am to 8pm

Webchat: mensadviceline.org.uk/contact-us 

Wednesday to Friday, 10am to 11am and 3pm to 4pm

Email: info@mensadviceline.org.uk

Website: www.mensadviceline.org.uk

There are other organisations that provide support to men, including Abused Men in Scotland, FearFree and Survivors UK. 

FearFree

Tel: 0131 624 7270 - this is not a support line and calls may go to answer machine

Email referral: fearfreeinfo@sacro.org.uk 

Website: fearfree.scot 

Online referral form available at: fearfree.scot/contact

Abused Men in Scotland (AMIS)

Helpline: 03300 949 395 (Monday to Friday 9am to 4pm)

Tel: 0131 447 7449 (Head Office)

Email for men looking for support: support@amis.org.uk

Email: contact@amis.org.uk

Website: abusedmeninscotland.org

Survivors UK

11 Sovereign Close

London

E1W 3HW

Text-based helpline: 020 3322 1860 (Monday to Friday from 10.30am to 9pm; Saturday and Sunday 10am to 6pm)

WhatsApp-based helpline: 07491 816064

Office tel: 020 3598 3898 (Monday to Friday from 9.30am to 5pm)

Email: info@survivorsuk.org

Website: www.survivorsuk.org

More support if you're LGBT+

FearFree is a Scottish support service for men, including trans men, and anyone from the LGBT+ community affected by domestic abuse. The service is available in many, but not all areas of Scotland. To refer yourself or someone else to the service use the online form or email. 

FearFree

Tel: 0131 624 7270 - this is not a support line and calls may go to answer machine

Email referral: fearfreeinfo@sacro.org.uk 

Website: fearfree.scot 

Online referral form available at: fearfree.scot/contact

Galop National LGBT Domestic Violence Helpline

Tel: 0300 999 5428 or Freephone 0800 999 5428 (Monday and Thursday 10.00am to 8.00pm; Friday 1.00pm to 5.00pm; Tuesday and Wednesday 10.00am to 5.00pm with Tuesday 1.00pm to 5.00pm being a Trans specific service).

Admin: 08452 605 560

Email: help@galop.org.uk

Website: www.galop.org.uk

More support if you're from an ethnic minority

There's specialist advice for Asian, black and minority ethnic women and children:

Hemat Gryffe Women's Aid

Tel: 0141 353 0859

Website: www.hematgryffe.org.uk

Shakti Women's Aid

Tel: 0131 475 2399

Website: www.shaktiedinburgh.co.uk

More support if you're a student

You don't have to be living with your abuser for it to be domestic abuse. You might be living in university halls of residence, for example.

You should phone Scotland's Domestic Abuse Helpline - it's for anyone over 16. 

Check if your university or college has a student advice service, crisis team or a helpline for abuse. If they don't, talk to a lecturer or someone who provides you with pastoral support. 

They should be able to help you with issues like:

  • breaks from studying and deadlines

  • university housing

  • university investigations against the abuser. 

Remember there's action you can take if your intimate photos or videos are shared over social media

More support if you're from outside the UK

You can call Scotland's Domestic Abuse and Forced Marriage Helpline even if you're not a UK citizen. There are translation services if English isn't your first language. 

You should get immigration advice as soon as possible. You might be able to apply to stay in the UK if your relationship ends because of domestic abuse. 

You can get immigration advice through:

  • The Domestic Abuse and Forced Marriage Helpline - they can help you access immigration advice

  • your local Citizens Advice Bureau 

  • Ethnic Minorities Law Centre

  • Scottish Women's Rights Centre. 

Ethnic Minorities Law Centre

41 St Vincent Place, 2nd Floor

Glasgow

G1 2ER

Helpline: 0141 204 2888, Monday to Friday 9.30am – 10.30am

Website: emlc.org.uk

More support if you're a child or young person

Domestic abuse can affect anyone, including children and young people.

If you’re a child or young person, you can find out how to get help on Scotland’s Domestic Abuse Helpline website.

If you're from outside the UK

You might be able to apply to stay in the UK or get back to the UK if your relationship has ended because of domestic abuse. Your options depend on your immigration status.

If you're the family member of an EU, EEA or Swiss citizen

If you got pre-settled status from the EU Settlement Scheme as a partner or dependent child, you can apply to stay in the UK permanently if your relationship with your family member ended because of domestic abuse.

You can either:

  • apply for indefinite leave to remain

  • upgrade your pre-settled status to settled status - you can only do this once you’ve been in the UK for 5 years

The rules for indefinite leave and settled status are different. It can be difficult to decide which option is best for you. Talk to an adviser to check what you should do.

If you haven't got pre-settled status yet, you can still apply to the EU Settlement Scheme if:

  • you're a family member of an EU, EEA or Swiss citizen who was living in the UK by 31 December 2020

  • your relationship with your family member ended because of domestic abuse.

The deadline for applying to the EU Settlement Scheme was 30 June 2021, but the government says domestic abuse is a good reason to make a late application for pre-settled status.

If you have a partner visa

You and your children can apply to stay in the UK or return to the UK permanently if your relationship with your partner has ended because of domestic abuse.

You can apply for 'indefinite leave to remain' if you're in the UK on a partner visa. You can also apply for indefinite leave to remain from outside the UK if your last UK visa was a partner visa. You can't apply if you're on a fiancé(e) or proposed civil partner visa.

Your partner must have been:

  • a British or Irish citizen

  • someone settled - this means they have indefinite leave to remain or settled status from the EU Settlement Scheme

  • an EU, EEA or Swiss citizen with pre-settled status

  • someone who's been in the British Armed Forces for at least 4 years

  • a refugee, stateless person or someone with humanitarian protection.

You might be able to get your current visa extended for 3 months. It will also let you access benefits while you're applying for indefinite leave to remain. You can download the form to apply for a 3-month extension on GOV.UK.

If your relationship ended because of domestic abuse, you can check how to apply for indefinite leave on GOV.UK.

Important

When to tell the Home Office

You must tell the Home Office as soon as you separate - explain your circumstances and that you've experienced domestic abuse. The Home Office might end your permission to stay as a partner, so it's important to make another application to stay as soon as possible.

It's important to get specialist immigration advice as soon as you can.

If you can't apply for indefinite leave or to the EU Settlement Scheme

If you have a child under 18 who lives in the UK and has permission to stay, check if you can apply for a family visa on GOV.UK.

If you can't go back to your home country because you fear persecution and want to stay in the UK as a refugee, check if you can claim asylum on GOV.UK.

If you have nowhere to stay and no money, you might be eligible for the Support for Migrant Victims scheme. You might get financial support and help with accommodation from the scheme.

An adviser will need to refer you to the scheme. Find out how to talk to an adviser.

If you recently arrived in the UK

You can find information about your rights if you've experienced domestic abuse on the Housing Rights Information website.

How a Citizens Advice Bureau adviser can help

In some cases you might not feel able to contact a specialist domestic abuse service or it may be easier to talk to an adviser at your local Citizens Advice Bureau first. This might be the case if you're already going to speak about your benefits or housing, for example. 

Citizens Advice Bureau advisers aren't specialists in domestic abuse but they can listen confidentially to you and:

  • help you contact specialist support

  • establish what you've already done and if you're in danger

  • make sure you have a plan before you leave the bureau

  • explain the longer term options you might have. 

An adviser can help you with housing, debt and benefits issues to help you live independently from your abuser. They will recommend seeing a lawyer about more complex housing, immigration and legal issues. 

Find your local Citizens Advice Bureau

Support for other forms of gender-based violence

Domestic abuse is often linked with other forms of gender-based violence and abuse. Read our advice if you've experienced:

National Stalking Helpline (run by Suzy Lamplugh Trust)

Tel: 0808 802 0300 (Monday, Tuesday, Thursday and Friday from 9.30am to 4.00pm; Wednesday from 1.00pm to 4.00pm)

Website: www.suzylamplugh.org