Domestic abuse

Domestic abuse is behaviour from a family member, partner or ex-partner. It can happen to people of all genders. It can include:

• physical or sexual abuse

• violent or threatening behaviour

• psychological or emotional abuse

• coercive behaviour - for example, humiliation or intimidation

• controlling behaviour - for example, making someone feel less important or dependent on the abuser

• 'economic abuse' - this includes controlling someone's possessions or how they earn or spend money

It can also include harassment, stalking, female genital mutilation, forced marriage and 'honour-based' abuse. Trafficking is also a type of domestic abuse - get help if you think you've been trafficked. 

If a child is under 18 and sees or hears domestic abuse happening to a family member, this is also domestic abuse. If they experience abuse, this is child abuse - check how to report child abuse.

If you've been affected

If you are the victim of an abusive relationship, you might want to:

• find somewhere safe to stay

• stay in your home and get the person who is harming you to leave

• report the violence to the police

• get a court order to stop your abusive partner from harming or threatening you

• take legal action

• get help from a charity or another organisation

Whatever you want to do, there are organisations that can give you advice and help. 

Finding somewhere safe to stay

You may need somewhere safe to stay, either alone or with your children. If you want to stay at home, you could get legal protection to keep the abuser away.

If you can't stay at home, you could:

• stay with relatives or friends

• stay in a refuge

• get emergency accommodation from the local authority under homeless persons law 

• get privately rented accommodation

Finding a refuge 

Refuges provide somewhere safe for people and their children to stay and think about what to do next.

Staff at refuges support people who've experienced domestic abuse. They can give emotional and practical support - for example, advice on benefit claims, which solicitors to use and, if necessary, how to contact the police.

If you're a woman you can contact the National Domestic Abuse Helpline on their website.

Helpline staff will tell you which refuges have spaces. They are also happy to answer questions.

If you're a man, you can contact the Men's Advice Line on their website.

Get help from your local council 

Local authorities have a legal duty to provide help to certain people who are homeless or threatened with homelessness. 

You will be considered to be legally homeless if it is not reasonable for you to occupy your home because of the risk or fear of domestic abuse.

Local authorities should deal sympathetically with applications from people who are in fear of violence. You can ask for a private interview, with someone of the same sex, and can take a friend with you for support.

The local authority may have a duty to provide emergency accommodation for you while it decides whether you are legally homeless.

If it is outside of normal office hours, you should telephone the local authority's emergency out-of-hours number for help with emergency housing.

Check if you can get homeless help from the council.

Going to privately rented accommodation

If you decide to go into privately rented accommodation you will be unlikely to be able to arrange it quickly - but it could be an option if you have time to plan your departure.

Reporting the violence to the police

Many kinds of domestic abuse are criminal offences and the police can arrest, caution or charge the perpetrator.

Most police stations have Domestic Violence Units or Community Safety Units with specially trained officers to deal with domestic violence and abuse.

You can call 999 in an emergency or 101 in a non-emergency or you can attend a police station in person to report an incident. Find your nearest police station on the UK Police Service Portal. You should tell the police what’s happened and let them know if you’re worried about your safety.

The police will decide if they’ll arrest the abuser - if they don’t arrest them, you might still be able to get legal protection from the court. For example, you could apply for an order to keep them away from your home.

If the police arrest and charge a perpetrator, they will decide whether to keep them in custody or release them on bail.

There will usually be conditions attached to their bail to protect you from further abuse. Make sure you ask for your crime reference number which you may need if you contact other agencies for help.

The Crown Prosecution Service or the police will make the final decision on whether your abusive partner is prosecuted, depending on the offence. If they're prosecuted, you might have to go to court. If you're worried about going to court, you can get free help and support from the Citizens Advice Witness Service. You can find more information on understanding the criminal prosecution service on the Women's Aid website.

The police can also give you advice on crime prevention and getting something called a police marker on your address, so an officer can get to your home as quickly as possible.

Get legal protection

You can ask the court to:

• stop your partner harming or threatening you – this is called a ‘non-molestation order’

• get your partner to leave your home or stop them coming back – this is called an ‘occupation order’

You can apply for a non-molestation order or an occupation order using a free tool called CourtNav that’s run by RCJ Citizens Advice. This is a Citizens Advice office which specialises in legal services.

The CourtNav system will help you find the best way forward and check if you can get legal aid to help with your legal costs. It will either:

• help you find a legal aid solicitor if you can get legal aid

• help you apply to the court yourself

You need to give an address where you’re staying – you can choose for your address not to be shared with your partner.

You can start an application through CourtNav.

Protection notices and orders

If you've experienced or been threatened with domestic abuse, you might be able to:

• ask the police to send the abuser a protection notice

• ask the court to make a protection order

The rules about protection orders and notices depend on where the abuser lives.

The Domestic Violence Disclosure Scheme

Under the Domestic Violence Disclosure Scheme, you can find out about a partner's history of domestic abuse from the police. The police might give you information if they have it and they think it's necessary to protect you. The police can also warn you about an individual if they think you are at risk of domestic abuse.

The abuser could still have a history of domestic abuse, even if the police don’t give you information about them. The police might not have given you information because either:

• they didn’t think it would help keep you safe

• the abuse wasn’t reported

Starting legal action

If you need further help, you should get advice from an independent domestic abuse adviser or a solicitor who is experienced in family law. You might need help to:

• get your property back or make you the legal owner of your home

• decide who your children live with and who can see them

• end your marriage or civil partnership

A local advice agency, such as a law centre or Citizens Advice, should be able to help you find a local solicitor who is experienced in this area of the law. In England and Wales, you can also look on the Law Society website.

You may be able to get help with your legal costs - you can check if you qualify for legal aid.

Legal aid helps you with your legal costs including advice and help if you have to go to court.

More about help with legal costs.

You should make an appointment as soon as you feel ready, and could take someone with you for support the first time you go. The initial interview will probably last quite a long time, during which the adviser should discuss with you what courses of legal action are open to you.

Going to a family court

Going to court can be stressful, but you can make things easier by finding out what will happen on the day. You should also think about how you can explain your side of the story.

Court hearings can happen at the court, by phone or video call, or a mixture of the two.

If the court hasn’t told you how to attend your hearing, contact them to find out. You can search for the court’s contact details on GOV.UK. 

You can:

• check what to do if you’re going to court in person on GOV.UK

• check how to prepare if your court hearing is by phone or video call

If you don’t have a lawyer

You can represent yourself at court. Get help with representing yourself at court on the Advicenow website.

If the abuser will be at your court hearing

The court can change what happens at the hearing so you don't have to see the abuser. These changes are called ‘special measures’. 

Special measures include things like: 

• letting you give evidence by video or from behind a screen

• putting you in a different waiting area to the abuser 

• making sure you don’t arrive and leave the court at the same time as the abuser

You can ask for special measures if you’ve experienced domestic abuse, or are at risk of it, and the abuser is:

• the other party in the case

• a relative of the other party in the case

• a witness in the case

It's best to contact the court before your hearing to ask for special measures so they have time to prepare. You can ask for special measures on the application form for your case. 

If you or the abuser are representing yourselves

The court might decide you shouldn't ask each other questions directly. You can also tell the court if you don't want to question the abuser, or be questioned by them. You can ask the court not to allow it using Form EX740. Download Form EX740 from GOV.UK and send or take it to the court.

The court can find another way to ask the questions. If your case started after 21 July 2022, the court might get a legal representative to ask the questions for you or the abuser. The representative will be provided by the court and you won’t have to pay. The representative can only help with asking questions and can’t give advice on anything else.

If you need help communicating or understanding

You can ask for extra help if you have a health condition that either: 

• could make it hard for you to understand what’s going on at the hearing

• could make it hard for people at the hearing to understand you

This includes if you have a learning difficulty or a mental health condition, such as  PTSD or severe anxiety.

If you're in this situation, you can get extra help from someone called an 'intermediary'. They'll tell the court what extra help you need. For example, they can suggest how the court should ask you questions or say when you need a break. During the hearing, they can help you understand the questions and what's happening. 

Check how to get intermediary support on GOV.UK.

Getting help from a charity or organisation

There are lots of charities and organisations that help both men and women get help with abuse. 

If you’re from outside the UK

You might be able to apply to stay in the UK or get back to the UK if your relationship has ended because of domestic abuse. Your options depend on your immigration status.

Important

When to tell the Home Office

You must tell the Home Office as soon as you separate - explain your circumstances and that you've experienced domestic abuse. The Home Office might end your permission to stay as a partner, so it's important to make another application to stay as soon as possible.

It's important to get advice from a specialist adviser or immigration lawyer as soon as you can. If you have no income or a low income, you can get legal aid to pay your lawyer’s fees.

If you can’t apply for indefinite leave or to the EU Settlement Scheme

If you have a child under 18 who lives in the UK and has permission to stay, check if you can apply for a family visa on GOV.UK.

If you can't go back to your home country because you fear persecution and want to stay in the UK as a refugee, check if you can claim asylum on GOV.UK.

If you have nowhere to stay and no money, you might be eligible for the Support for Migrant Victims scheme. You might get financial support and help with accommodation from the scheme. 

You’ll need to be referred to the scheme by an adviser - talk to an adviser.

If you recently arrived in the UK

You can find information about your rights if you've experienced domestic abuse on the Housing Rights Information website.

Economic abuse

Economic abuse happens where a perpetrator uses financial means to control you and may include any of the following:

• stopping you from working

• controlling your household finances including wages, benefits and bank accounts

• forcing you to hand over wages and money

• persuading or forcing you to take out loans and credit in your name

• stopping you from using things like transport or the phone

• stops you getting your post

If you have been pressurised or bullied to take out loans or credit in your name, the debt may be unenforceable - you should talk to an adviser. 

The domestic abuse charity Refuge has produced a financial guide for women experiencing domestic abuse at www.refuge.org.uk.

You can also talk to an adviser about debt problems.

If someone stops you getting your post, you might not see important information about your money or debt - this is economic abuse. You can have your post delivered to a different address that only you can access. Find out how you can protect your post on the Surviving Economic Abuse website.

Honour-based abuse

Honour-based abuse is defined as an incident or crime which has or may have been committed to protect or defend the honour of the family and or community. Honour-based abuse happens where a person is punished by their family or community for doing things that are not in keeping with the traditional beliefs of their culture. For example, you may be a victim of honour-based abuse because you:

• resist an arranged marriage

• resist a forced marriage

• have a partner from a different culture or religion

• live a westernised lifestyle

• want a divorce.

Honour-based abuse may include domestic abuse, sexual or psychological abuse, assault, forced marriage or sending someone back to their country of origin.

The Honour Network Helpline is a specialist organisation which advises victims and survivors of forced marriage and honour-based abuse. You can contact the Honour Network Helpline on their website.

You can find out how to get help on the Karma Nirvana website.

More about organisations which give information and advice on domestic abuse and other types of abuse.

Forced marriage

A forced marriage is where you are pressurised into it against your will. You may be emotionally blackmailed or physically threatened usually by your family. It is not the same as an arranged marriage where both parties are aged over 18 and agree to get married.

From 27 February 2023, it's illegal for someone to arrange your marriage if you're under 18 years old. It will be a forced marriage even if you agree to the marriage and weren't pressured into it.

In England and Wales, forced marriage is a criminal offence. If someone forces you into marriage, they could go to prison for up to seven years.

More about forced marriage

Female genital mutilation

Female genital mutilation (FGM) is when part or all of a girl or young woman's genitals are removed or injured for non-medical reasons. It's sometimes called ‘female genital cutting’ or ‘female circumcision’. Some communities use local names for referring to FGM, for example ‘sunna’. FGM is a criminal offence. 

Find out more about FGM.

Harassment and stalking

Harassment happens when you receive unwanted behaviour from another person which alarms or distresses you. Examples of harassment include malicious phone calls, threatening texts, threatening and insulting language and damage to property.

Stalking is a form of harassment and might include behaviour such as:

• following you

• contacting or attempting to contact you

• monitoring your email and internet

• watching and spying on you

It's a criminal and civil offence for another person to harass or stalk you. You should report the matter to the police, they might be able to apply for a stalking protection order (SPO).

You might also be able to apply to the civil courts to:

• get an injunction to stop the harassment and stalking

• claim damages

This could take longer than getting an SPO from the police, but is still worth doing. If a harasser breaches an injunction, it's a criminal offence.

You can get information and guidance on how to deal with harassment and stalking from the National Stalking Helpline website.

Further help

There are many organisations that can give you confidential advice and support. 

More about organisations which can help you if you're a victim of abuse